Friday, January 6, 2012

Birthmom

As hard as infertility is, someday Tyson and I will be parents, and will feel great joy in our children.  I feel sad a lot because of infertility, but in the adoption story there is another mother that feels love and pain: the birthmother.  One of these days, we will meet a very brave woman, and I've been thinking about her a lot lately.

What will she be like?  I don't know, but I'd like to think she will turn out to be a dear friend.  I feel scared to meet her, but I'm sure she will be scared to meet us.  I hope we can make her feel loved and appreciated-- and comfortable around us.

I know I won't understand the grief she will experience.  I know I won't be able to thank her enough.  I also know I won't fail her in being a good mother to her child.

I can't carry a child, but I feel like there are children meant to be in my family.  Is that all a birthmother is?  A one time conduit between us and our baby?  I think she is more. 

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